An Irish Lesbian's thoughts and observations…

Archive for July, 2013

Lonely Skye Part Two

“Skye!” shouted Clark as he wrapped his arms tightly around her skeletal frame. “Clark, get off, you’re hurting me you clown” she said as she wriggled out of his grip. “I’m sorry Skye but we all thought you were… uhm… dead” sighed Clark. “I’m not dead. Not yet anyway. But that’s not why I came here. I need somewhere to stay for a few weeks, max! Please.” The look of horror and confusion on his face told her that she had almost revealed too much. She hastily said “Look all I meant was we all gotta die sometime, don’t we? Now can you give me somewhere to crash for a while or not?” Clark thought about it as he moved back behind the counter and poured a cup of coffee. He decided she could stay if she explained her absence over the past few months. Not even their parents could or would shed light on it. All they would say was that she was better off on her own. A twenty five year old preferring to be alone certainly didn’t make sense to him. Skye fidgeted as she stared down at her dirty Converse. She promised she would reveal all to him if he gave her a chance so it was agreed that she could have the spare room in Clark’s flat above his diner. She could almost scream with joy.

She broke down in floods of tears once she sat on the edge of her new bed. Since her parents kicked her out she has been drifting aimlessly until now. Skye wanted nothing more than to become a man however now that will never happen. She told her parents this on Christmas eve. A time of family and love. Yeah, right. As part of a routine doctor’s examination her dream ended abruptly. Now her true love and best friend has abandoned her because of fear. She envied amnesia sufferers because they don’t constantly churn their mistakes and regrets around in their minds. Life is easy to them and then it’s over.

She confessed her desired identity to Clark who was surprisingly not surprised. He chuckled briefly then seriously stated that someone would have to be blind and deaf to notice her opposition to anything overly girl related. She couldn’t help but smile when he said this. So she was always true to herself. Amazing. “What happened to you anyway? Have you even been eating over the past while? You’re skin and bone!” Clark interrupted her thought process. “Oh I’ve just been cutting down on junk food. It saves me more money. I quit smoking too.” “So you may be able to afford hormone treatment then if you’re saving money?” he tentatively asked. “Yeah. Yeah, I guess so.” she replied. He knew she was being purposefully evasive and distant. This isn’t going to be easy she thought to herself.

To be continued…

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Lonely Skye

She went racing through the darkness as fast as her twiggy legs would carry her. Maybe if she ran fast enough she might disappear completely. Sweat trickled down her pale forehead. she was shaking so much her muscles ached. The beads of sweat danced among the salt of her tears. She tripped over a lone dusty rock. “No, no, no…” she cried to herself. The heavy weight upon her shoulders came tumbling down around her. The events of the past few weeks were becoming too much for her to handle. “I have to keep moving.” she muttered to herself. She moved quickly to her feet then swayed slightly. The sudden movement caused her to become dizzy. She laughed to herself at the irony of this moment. Her life was spiraling out of control much like the world is now as it revolves around her. She steadied herself then moved towards home. “Home” to Skye is not bricks and mortar. Home is really where her heart belongs. In a dark and shabby diner along a back street in town. As much as it hurts her to go there alone it is something she must do. The people in town seem so carefree. Why? Why are they so happy when her world is over? They’re lucky. They are strong. Yes, that must be it. They must be much stronger than her or how on earth could they be so calm. She needs to talk. Someone once told her that talking helped everything. Or maybe that’s tea… Well, a chat over tea can’t do any harm either way. The rusted old door of the cafe creaks loudly as she pushes it forward. There is solace behind this door. “Clark, something terrible has happened…” she proclaims.

To be continued…

LGBTQ Pride

Pride season is well and truly underway here in Ireland. Dublin welcomed an estimated 30,000 for it’s annual LGBTQ Pride Festival which was fantastic! With a Pride Festival taking place all over Ireland and probably somewhere near you it is really an exciting time of year to celebrate our true colours. With the Constitutional Convention (http://www.marriagequality.ie/getinvolved/constitutionalconvention) looming it is a time when we may finally gain full recognition in our country. This is a very progressive time to be part of the great rainbow but in my opinion it is also a time when it is more important than ever to remember our roots and remember all of those who have fought so hard to get us to where we are today. Pride is a celebration for all but it is also a tribute to the hardships that LGBT people have faced and are continuing to face on a daily basis. For every insult you have ever received and for every punch you have ever taken make sure you shout louder when you are marching through the streets in whichever Pride parade you choose to visit this year. We’ve gotten so far now that it would be such a pity to see people disheartened by the ignorance of some. Be true to yourself and you will never have regrets. So many people are still ashamed of their sexuality which is so upsetting to see. Like the great American Harvey Milk once said “Hope will never be silent”. There are more people on our side than you can imagine. It is no longer an us against them movement. It is now a nationwide fight for the equality of all. Never give up and never hide who you are to please others. If you choose to hide you are allowing yourself to lose out on so much happiness.

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